[The why is definitely complicated, and not something he's permitted to come clean about, but even if he's not smart enough not to sell contraband lyrium out of the back of his shop, at least he's smart enough to know how to answer her question.]
Well, I always had a knack for apothecary, so I'm going into being a healer. And it's a way to use the, um, magic-thing, in a way that's not adding to anyone's problems.
[He might have assumed someone told her he's a mage, but he hasn't told her himself. He doesn't really tell people, per se, and if no one has told her, she's in for a rude shock.]
[ She's figured it out herself by now. That he's a mage. She's not exactly comfortable with it, but - she'd be an idiot to keep thinking that mages here are like mages back home. Aside from the bit where they're all apparently complete arseholes.
Her voice goes sharp, losing all the politeness she'd used with him prior. ]
I'm sorry - just like that? I'm out of a job just like that 'cause you want to explore your knack?
Nnnno? [It's not sarcastic so much as deeply uncertain which answer will get her angriest at him.] You're mad employable, Kitty. You'll be out of a job exactly as long as it takes you to walk from here to the seneschal's office to ask for a new one. Or you can take the shop.
[He takes on a vaguely self-deprecating tone.] You know, pathetic and sad, like me? Or do you not have time to work a really good job that gives you a measure of independence from the Inquisition?
Did you ever hear the words pathetic or sad coming from my mouth? And believe me, if I thought 'em, I'd say 'em. Is there some reason I should think you're pathetic?
They're my words, not y--look, now that you’re accusing me of abandoning you, I'm asking you why it's a good enough job for me but not for you, except less confrontational than that. I’m literally offering you the entire shop and somehow you’re angry with me?
[The reverse snobbery has gone out of him, leaving him deflated. He has never kept his comparative lack of ambition secret. Everyone in the Inquisition seems to think him mad or lazy, but not Kitty. Kitty knows he’s not the hero of anyone’s story, not even his own.]
[ It does seem bizarre to her. Where she's from, owning a business is as grand a dream as dreams get. Maybe it is that he's a mage? He expects more from life as a result? But he doesn't really seem the type. ]
Look, I don't know anything about what that means. Something meaningful. All I know is that I'm a rifter, aren't I, and so things are different for someone like me.
[Being among these bright hopefuls has affected him more than he thought.]. Um. Until recently, half our division heads were rifters. One still is. Things aren’t any different for someone like you as for someone like me. They think I’m a demon too, you know.
[ That's...Right. Mages are supposed to be demonic here, aren't they? It's a weird thought. ]
It's not about what people think of me. I mean - I don't much care what people think of me, you know. It's more...You know, maybe we're both demons or whatever, but I'm a demon who only seems to live two or three years at most. If the other rifters are anything to go by. I mean, there's hardly anything sillier than working towards a long and prosperous life when it's certainly not going to be long, don't you think?
no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 01:39 am (UTC)I, um. I'm not going to work my shop anymore. Do you...want it?
[It's awkward, but he's not teasing her.]
no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 01:43 am (UTC)Wait - what? Why?
no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 02:12 am (UTC)Well, I always had a knack for apothecary, so I'm going into being a healer. And it's a way to use the, um, magic-thing, in a way that's not adding to anyone's problems.
[He might have assumed someone told her he's a mage, but he hasn't told her himself. He doesn't really tell people, per se, and if no one has told her, she's in for a rude shock.]
no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 10:38 am (UTC)Her voice goes sharp, losing all the politeness she'd used with him prior. ]
I'm sorry - just like that? I'm out of a job just like that 'cause you want to explore your knack?
no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 09:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 10:03 pm (UTC)I'm not going to take the shop. If I took the shop it'd become - like - a full-time job.
no subject
Date: 2018-07-11 11:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 02:54 am (UTC)[ The anger mixes, momentarily, with a genuine confusion. ]
Why would it be pathetic?
no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 03:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 03:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 03:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 12:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 02:07 pm (UTC)[The reverse snobbery has gone out of him, leaving him deflated. He has never kept his comparative lack of ambition secret. Everyone in the Inquisition seems to think him mad or lazy, but not Kitty. Kitty knows he’s not the hero of anyone’s story, not even his own.]
no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 02:58 pm (UTC)[ It does seem bizarre to her. Where she's from, owning a business is as grand a dream as dreams get. Maybe it is that he's a mage? He expects more from life as a result? But he doesn't really seem the type. ]
Look, I don't know anything about what that means. Something meaningful. All I know is that I'm a rifter, aren't I, and so things are different for someone like me.
no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 03:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-07-12 03:59 pm (UTC)It's not about what people think of me. I mean - I don't much care what people think of me, you know. It's more...You know, maybe we're both demons or whatever, but I'm a demon who only seems to live two or three years at most. If the other rifters are anything to go by. I mean, there's hardly anything sillier than working towards a long and prosperous life when it's certainly not going to be long, don't you think?