[ She shouldn't have what? Something. There was some step in there where she went wrong. I don't know where that little girl went, all that's left is this surly vixen -
She shakes her head to rid herself of the echo of her father's voice. No. Enough trouble here without falling into the trap of memory. ]
I'm sorry. For getting you in trouble. For not... [ Saying anything. ]
It is. he ( corrects, and firmly. ) And it is not your fault, Kitty. If I am 'in trouble' ( and this he doubts, but who knows, ) then I will handle it.
[ She winces. Had she really said his name? God, how much had she blathered on in the height of passion? How stupid. ]
I shouldn't have said anything. It doesn't matter.
[ But Thranduil's a Rifter, too, no less than she is. It's a little easy to forget sometimes, with all his confidence, with his authority, with his connections, but he is a Rifter. So he's been told a hundred times, just like her, that his home is fake and everything's made up and none of it matters. She remembers that, and so she takes a breath and says - before she loses her courage - ]
Back home, I had been a member of a revolutionary cell that was resisting the government and trying to take down the magicians, because magicians were in charge of our government, like Tevinter, and Mr Pennyfeather was the leader of the cell. It was me and ten others, and most of us were kids - [ And it's taken her this war to realize how truly dreadful that fact was - ] But he wasn't - he was an old man, who'd lost his wife to a magician, and so he hated them. Much as any of us. More, probably. And so he sent us out. And we died. And there came a point where I saw that none of it was for anything good, none of it was for freedom, that at some point he'd lost sight of everything and just turned it into collecting artefacts, to hoarding power that came from things, and that's what we were dying for. That's what all of us died for.
[ It comes out in a rather breathless flow. Soon as it's done, she flushes, because she's never told anyone that full story before, and it's painful and ridiculous and foolish. But it's said, and so she ducks her head and starts gathering up plates. ]
( he goes and unlocks the door, and listens to her speak while he picks the remains of food off the plates and onto one single one, which he places on the floor. leviathan comes out from under the bed and tucks into the leftovers, his little hands resting on the rim of the plate. it's adorable.
but it gives thranduil something to do while he listens, to give kitty the peace of getting to say it without having to look at him. )
I am sorry you were ill-used, Kitty. You burn so brightly- it is a horror that anyone would seek to turn that to their own ends.
( and she'd gone willingly, hadn't she, with no other way to fight back. children made poor soldiers, unless they were fodder. he would comfort her- a hand on her back, a kinder word, but he already offered her a large measure of that, and she might be overflowing from it already.
best to leave it be. )
Thank you for telling me. Whenever you wish it, I will tell you anything at all you would like to know about me or my past.
No, I - didn't get used. I wasn't tricked or anything. I - wanted it.
[ Even though she knows distantly that the Kitty of five years ago, that angry trusting twelve-year-old girl, didn't understand what it meant to fight. And even though she knows distantly that no kid really understands what it is to fight.
And yet you have to do it anyway. If she could do it all over again - She would. Because even if you're a kid, and even if life would be so much better if you didn't know what it was to hurt another person, you've still got to stand up to injustice. There is no peace in an unjust world.
But enough of that. She shakes her head and confesses - ]
I don't know anything about you. I don't even know where I'd start to ask.
( he nods. the last of the cornbread is tied in to a napkin and set at the corner of the table. )
You know many things about me, as only one who follows on another's heels could. My handwriting, my reading habits, my working hours. What else is there- where I was born; Doriath, how I met my wife; in Skyhold, on the parapets, my favorite tree; the rowan.
( he catches her eye while she works, and smiles. it's little- he isn't a full-toothed grinner unless it's nearer to a sneer. this is more like a secret they're sharing, conspiratorial. )
It was beautiful. ( and mm, that's definitely longing and a glance towards the window. ) The trees grew tall and dense, and our city was within a thousand carved caves on the banks of the Esgalduin. All was fair to behold, and all water sweet to drink.
( he doesn't get more elfy than this. )
It is a protective tree. It wards off ill. And I enjoy the taste of the fruit.
I'm with you, believe me. Factories were a place where weapons got made using people as their raw parts. I don't even know how many of my neighbors had lost fingers or arms to places like that.
Had you been outside a city before you came to Thedas?
( the nug finishes with the food on the plate, and then lifts his little hands to inefficiently lick them. thranduil turns away from her to take it off the floor. )
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 12:44 am (UTC)It's not your fault. I - I oughtn't -
[ She shouldn't have what? Something. There was some step in there where she went wrong. I don't know where that little girl went, all that's left is this surly vixen -
She shakes her head to rid herself of the echo of her father's voice. No. Enough trouble here without falling into the trap of memory. ]
I'm sorry. For getting you in trouble. For not... [ Saying anything. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 01:00 am (UTC)All will be well. I told you so.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 01:18 am (UTC)[ A sniff, and a physical adjustment of her shoulders, and then a much firmer - ]
Is there work to be done?
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 01:23 am (UTC)( he is- proud of her, but he knew that already. )
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 01:52 am (UTC)[ She winces. Had she really said his name? God, how much had she blathered on in the height of passion? How stupid. ]
I shouldn't have said anything. It doesn't matter.
[ But Thranduil's a Rifter, too, no less than she is. It's a little easy to forget sometimes, with all his confidence, with his authority, with his connections, but he is a Rifter. So he's been told a hundred times, just like her, that his home is fake and everything's made up and none of it matters. She remembers that, and so she takes a breath and says - before she loses her courage - ]
Back home, I had been a member of a revolutionary cell that was resisting the government and trying to take down the magicians, because magicians were in charge of our government, like Tevinter, and Mr Pennyfeather was the leader of the cell. It was me and ten others, and most of us were kids - [ And it's taken her this war to realize how truly dreadful that fact was - ] But he wasn't - he was an old man, who'd lost his wife to a magician, and so he hated them. Much as any of us. More, probably. And so he sent us out. And we died. And there came a point where I saw that none of it was for anything good, none of it was for freedom, that at some point he'd lost sight of everything and just turned it into collecting artefacts, to hoarding power that came from things, and that's what we were dying for. That's what all of us died for.
[ It comes out in a rather breathless flow. Soon as it's done, she flushes, because she's never told anyone that full story before, and it's painful and ridiculous and foolish. But it's said, and so she ducks her head and starts gathering up plates. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:04 am (UTC)but it gives thranduil something to do while he listens, to give kitty the peace of getting to say it without having to look at him. )
I am sorry you were ill-used, Kitty. You burn so brightly- it is a horror that anyone would seek to turn that to their own ends.
( and she'd gone willingly, hadn't she, with no other way to fight back. children made poor soldiers, unless they were fodder. he would comfort her- a hand on her back, a kinder word, but he already offered her a large measure of that, and she might be overflowing from it already.
best to leave it be. )
Thank you for telling me. Whenever you wish it, I will tell you anything at all you would like to know about me or my past.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:11 am (UTC)[ Even though she knows distantly that the Kitty of five years ago, that angry trusting twelve-year-old girl, didn't understand what it meant to fight. And even though she knows distantly that no kid really understands what it is to fight.
And yet you have to do it anyway. If she could do it all over again - She would. Because even if you're a kid, and even if life would be so much better if you didn't know what it was to hurt another person, you've still got to stand up to injustice. There is no peace in an unjust world.
But enough of that. She shakes her head and confesses - ]
I don't know anything about you. I don't even know where I'd start to ask.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:19 am (UTC)You know many things about me, as only one who follows on another's heels could. My handwriting, my reading habits, my working hours. What else is there- where I was born; Doriath, how I met my wife; in Skyhold, on the parapets, my favorite tree; the rowan.
( he catches her eye while she works, and smiles. it's little- he isn't a full-toothed grinner unless it's nearer to a sneer. this is more like a secret they're sharing, conspiratorial. )
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:23 am (UTC)[ And, with a little more curiosity: ]
And why rowan? 'Cause it wards off magic?
peanuts adults talking noise
Date: 2019-10-18 02:29 am (UTC)( he doesn't get more elfy than this. )
It is a protective tree. It wards off ill. And I enjoy the taste of the fruit.
elf gonna elf
Date: 2019-10-18 02:32 am (UTC)Just caves? Did you have any sort of improvements? Like - did you have sewage systems? Were there kitchens built into 'em?
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:37 am (UTC)They were- carved. Purposeful. Decorated.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:49 am (UTC)( it just sounds like a big river by the name. )
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:52 am (UTC)No. There was...industry, though.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 02:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 03:02 am (UTC)I'm with you, believe me. Factories were a place where weapons got made using people as their raw parts. I don't even know how many of my neighbors had lost fingers or arms to places like that.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 03:16 am (UTC)( the nug finishes with the food on the plate, and then lifts his little hands to inefficiently lick them. thranduil turns away from her to take it off the floor. )
no subject
Date: 2019-10-18 03:20 am (UTC)Kitty shakes her head no. ]